An old man has given a string of advice that many of his readers find uncomfortable.
Trouble started when a Quora user made a simple suggestion, asking, “People in their 70s, what life advice would you give to people in their 30s?”
In response, another Quora user, Bill Otto, who lives in Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA, says, “I am not giving advice. So, here are some things you probably won’t hear,”
I wish I had driven more aggressively when I was younger.
I wish I had slept around more.
I wish I had spent more time at work just for the heck of it.
I wish I had invested more in crypto currencies.
I wish I hadn’t spent so much time with family. (You ARE entitled to stay away from abusive and manipulative ones!)
I wish I had partied more and wasted more time pranking.
I wish I had spent more money keeping up appearances instead of wasting it on retirement savings.
I wish I hadn’t tried to keep myself so healthy.
I wish I had been more petty, harder to please, and more selfish.
I wish I had acted more entitled and been more demanding. That way I would have fooled myself into feeling more important.
I wish I had stayed home more and done nothing.
I wish I had spent more time keeping everything spotless and looking like a museum. But I also wish I had let my home fall apart and turn into a dump because it wasn’t worth the effort.
I wish I hadn’t pushed myself to do the right thing when it took some effort.
I wish I hadn’t wasted time reading so many books.
I wish I had spent more time watching mindless television and listening to talk radio.
I wish I hadn’t wasted time and money doing house repairs correctly.
I wish I hadn’t wasted time helping other people.
I wish I had been more of a sourpuss.
I wish I had spent more time annoying the neighbors and bragging about it.
I wish I had spent more time pissing off people that I worked with because I hated my job and was too lazy/insecure to do anything about it.
I wish I had never volunteered to do anything for my community.
I wish I held on to Commodore, AOL, Enron, and Kodak stock.
I wish I had spent more time trolling and spreading conspiracy theories on social media. That way I would have felt more respected.
Later, after seeing the responses of his readers, he returned to explain himself, saying, “For those having trouble with it, this is a list of things I will never say.
“I have been informed that a large number of people don’t get the hang of irony or sarcasm. I did not think I would have to spell it out because of the investment clues, like holding on to Commodore, AOL or Enron stock.
“I guess some people don’t really understand these references.”
