Have you ever talked to yourself? Or, do you often talk to yourself?
Maybe you’ve said, “I can do this!” before a test; or asked, “Where are my keys?” while looking for them. Don’t worry, this is normal! Lots of people talk to themselves.
This talking to yourself is called self-talk. It’s like having a little voice in your head. This voice can say good things or sometimes not-so-good things.
But why do we do this? And is it helpful? People who study how our minds work have looked into this. They’ve found some interesting answers.
In this article, we’ll talk about what self-talk is, why we do it, and how it can be good or bad for us. We’ll also give you some tips on how to make your self-talk more helpful in your everyday life.
What’s self-talk?
Self-talk is that little voice in your head. It’s how you talk to yourself, whether out loud or in your mind. This inner chatter can be good or bad, and it affects how you feel and act.
Why do we do it?
We talk to ourselves for lots of reasons:
• To solve problems: Talking through a tricky situation can help you figure it out
• To boost confidence: Giving yourself a pep talk can make you feel braver
• To focus better: Saying things out loud can help you concentrate
• To deal with feelings: Talking about your emotions can help you understand them
Research conducted by Dr. Gary Lupyan at the University of Wisconsin-Madison found that saying the name of something you’re looking for can help you find it faster. So next time you lose your phone, try saying “phone” out loud!
Is it normal?
Yes, it’s totally normal to talk to yourself. A study led by Dr. Thomas Brinthaupt at Middle Tennessee State University found that almost everyone does it. It’s only a problem if you’re always saying mean things to yourself or if it gets in the way of your daily life.
Good things about positive self-talk
When you say nice things to yourself, it can help you:
• Do better: Research by Dr. Antonis Hatzigeorgiadis at the University of Thessaly showed that athletes who use positive self-talk often perform better
• Focus more: Saying instructions out loud can help with hard tasks
• Feel calmer: Encouraging words can help with nerves
• Stay motivated: Cheering yourself on can help you keep going when things get tough
Dealing with negative self-talk
Sometimes we can be too hard on ourselves. If you find yourself saying mean things, try these tips:
• Talk to yourself like a friend: Say “You’ve got this” instead of “I’ve got this”
• Think of good things: Focus on what you’re thankful for
• Question negative thoughts: Ask if they’re really true
• Stay in the moment: Don’t worry too much about the past or future
Dr. Ethan Kross from the University of Michigan found that talking to yourself in the third person can help you handle stress better. So try saying “You can do this” instead of “I can do this” when you’re feeling nervous.
When to get help
While self-talk is usually fine, sometimes it can be a sign of a bigger problem. Talk to a doctor if:
• You’re always saying really mean things to yourself
• You hear voices that aren’t yours
• Your self-talk is getting in the way of your daily life
• You can’t control your thoughts
Too much negative self-talk can be linked to problems like depression and anxiety. If you’re worried about your self-talk, it’s okay to ask for help.
The bottom line
Talking to yourself is normal and can even be helpful. The key is to be kind to yourself when you do it. Dr. Paloma Mari-Beffa from Bangor University says that self-talk can be a powerful tool for improving how we think and act.
So, next time you catch yourself muttering, don’t worry! Just make sure you’re saying nice things to yourself.
Remember, your inner voice is like a friend you carry with you all the time. Make sure it’s a good friend that supports and encourages you. With practice, you can make your self-talk work for you, helping you feel more confident, focused, and positive in your daily life.
